" Your Host Family is as confused, excited, anxious as you!"

Hey there everyone,

First of all I just want to say that, I REALLY REALLY do miss everybody although don't get me wrong, I am just loving this experience so far. Since the last time I posted on here, things have gotten 10 times more intense in terms of presentations after presentations about policies, procedures, medical/safety. And we actually started riding our bikes out around town to check out our potential Host family sites (tumbons - villages) that they call them and the farthest tumbon can even be about 15 mile bike ride. Since I am in the "novice" group of bike riders I am keeping my fingers crossed that I would not need to ride 15 miles (30 miles total) to get to my Hub - even if its once a week. You know how it used to be " Be careful when you drive" hahaah try " be careful when you ride". The traffic laws here are " written but not really that much enforced, and pedestrians do NOT have a right-of-way, nor does two-wheelers " so although we as bike riders are a level above pedestrians in the " road hirarchy" .... we still pretty screwed if not really really careful.

*** I'm seriously not trying to scare anybody - we got helmets :) AND plus after 10 miles yesterday and 15 miles today, i'm SO NOT a novice rider nemore :)

Another exciting things that we did so far, WE GOT CELL PHONES lol, well j.k. seriously though, we met the Chainat Province Governator (i meant the Governor :) It was in a serious conference room and we all had like microphones where we stood up one by one and introduced our selves in Thai " How are you, My name is Zerina, Last name Borhan. I am from City Wilmington, State Delaware, Country America" SERIOUSLY that's how its translated exactly from Thai to English. If i was the Governor I would be really really disinterested after the first 10 people saying the same thing - forget 61! Regardless, it was a cool experience for us :)

Even more exciting, with those two sentences of Thai , we move into our Host Family site tomorrow hahaha It's going to be everything and anything you are imagining right now. I do not even have the mind-capacity to imagine how all that is going to turn out ... obstacle or opportunity???? (something to ponder huh?)

Well with that, who knows when will be the next time I post, I might get lucky and get assigned to a family with internet (or not)... but once a week our 'hub' meeting/training day will be back here in the Hotel. But even then, I do not know the chance of me getting online... I'll keep all of you posted on my being/host family situation as soon as I can. But i doubt it'll be all that horrible or even near horrible. I've heard worst comes the worst " just smile" so why not...i'm good at doing that at least.

***** If u really need to know/concerned u can always call me :) 011 66 878499773******

So far as I know the next 10 weeks of training will focus on getting into the " details" of things - i.e. intense cultural, language, technical training... EVERYTHING that will prepare us -Community Based Organizational Development Volunteers (the CBODers) - for our actual service starting March. There is a qualification process and as far as I know.... CBODers gota have an intermediate level of language (compared to the Novice level of the Teacher Volunteers). So yes, we do not just get sworn in without a Test. which means if I'm back in the States in March well then, you'll know why... hahaha So far though, I do not have an ounce of regret , therefore let's hope no one gets sent home :)

I miss you al, and I hope that everyone is doing well in the cold while I ride my bike, learn some Thai , live with my Host family under the 80degree sun of Thailand :)

- Zari

Training - 1 day/10 weeks

I have finally arrived in Thailand and went through my first day of training as a Peace Corps Trainee today and luckily it was not all that intense (perhaps they realized that more than half of us would be jetlagged). There are about 64 volunteers all together. 34 of which are the 'teaching' group and the rest are the "Community Based Organizational Development" volunteers (me). We got to the hotel at Chainat Province at 2am on the morning of 19th. Our first day of training entailed administrative presentations, health information (had two immunization shots), logistics, bank accounts (we have a bank account here in Thailand set up for our monthly allowances) and lastly, some intro language lessons. So far I know how to say " Hi how are you, what is your name...My name is..." Not all that fancy but tomorrow all that will continue.

On Thursday, we are meeting the Governor of Chainat and the Chief of the District where we will be introducing ourselves in Thai....that should be fun. And, on Saturday we move into our Host Family whom we will be staying with until March/April. I'm sure that is when our "real" Peace Corps experience will begin. I will not lie, we are getting pretty spoiled here at the Hotel in Chainat. Shower, Electricity (A.C.), Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner all ready on a timely basis.

It is pretty amazing how the staff here has everything organized down to every detail. Very impressive. I can tell that they seriously want our needs to be covered in terms of language lessons, cultural lessons, safety procedures, medical care. The Medical Kit that we were given has everything from Tums, Ibuprofen, thermometer, SPF, bug spray...etc.

Tomorrow our training starts at 8am. Therefore I'm thinking that if I go to sleep by 10 tonight, I can at least get 8 hours of sleep (jet lag kicks in at the most horrible times during the day). So far, I know that tomorrow we will be getting our bikes assigned and doing some riding lessons; on top of, continuous language courses, policy talks, and other immunization matters. I just want to make sure that all of you know that I am doing very well. Part of me trust that I am very good hands with all the Peace Corps people that I am surrounded with. First day in and I have no regrets :) Enjoying every moment of it all and I will keep you all updated as much as possible though after I move into my Host family I am not sure how often I will get to an internet access. Till then I should be getting a phone so that those of you (Mom and Dad) can reach me that way.

Toughest job you will ever Love :)

- Zari

Start of something new....

I woke up this morning at 3 a.m well basically I did not really sleep, went to PHL and to L.A by 10 am. Saying good Bye to Mom was the hardest part. She just held me so tight and did not want to let me go... I had to be strong for her, hoping that she finds her strength through me. I love her more than anything/anyone in this World and I know that she is stronger than she presents her self to be. The next couple years will be tough for the both of us, but you know what people say... ' what does not kill you, ONLY makes you stronger "
Everything was so so so overwhelming, the people coming in, every other minute you asking a new person " so what's your name? where r u from?.." after like the first 10 times, you realize well maybe i should just let it happen .. i got 27 months to get to know everyone anyways.
Everything started at 2pm, without actually being able to check in, after changing into " business casual" in the bathroom just for orientation in a hot stuffed room with 64 people, we officially became Peace Corps Trainees hahaha, Apparently, AFTER we pass the Language Test we will then only become official Peace Corps volunteers. OH btw, the 64 people are a DIVERSE group of individuals. All the way from fresh out of college students (moi), to people in their 30s and even a good number of 50 plus :) I SO Admire everyone's courage and you know what, it's amazing to be with a group of people who just " GET " your reasoning for being on this journey ... :) I cannot wait to get to know people more and more as days go by...

Staging (or Orientation) involved us analyzing scenarios, understanding the purpose of the Peace Corps, understading our anxieties, aspirations as PC.Vs. Yikes anxieties
- Language
- Not too much privacy
- Loneliness AFTER being separated to our own villages
- Different work ethics
- health concerns
- sexual harrassment
- Not finding the 'niche' in your community
- bugs, snakes, dogs, mosquitos...
- overheated, dehydration...

It was tiring I will not lie esp since I have not really had the chance to 'unwind' since 5am ... well i guess i have to reallize the next 27 months will be less and less about me and more and more about what I will be doing for others.... makes sense :)

FINALLY, at 7 i got to my room, unpacked some things, showered and now lying in bed updating my blog (after dinner). the Peace Corps gave us $120 to spend for the night . ... which I used to get a 20 dollar meal at the restaurant and the rest.... well perhaps some breakfast tomorrow and whatever left will turn into THAI BAHT! c u all on the other side :)
I will be spending a week in a Hotel in Bangkok, so the next time you see me updating my blog, it will be about my 19 hrs of flight/hotel journey/ and whatever else comes up.... Here I come :)

BTW, some girls and I were talking about how this is also the time when 'true friendships' can be tested, i.e. who actually takes the time out to write the letters through postmail, sends carepackages and genuinely cares for your safety... :) alrity my luvly friends... let's see :) time for those letters :)

Serenity, Strength and Wisdom
- Zari

The Day before Orientation..

It's the day before I fly out of PHL to go to LAX.. a day of orientation there then again, waking up at 5 am on Sunday to fly to Japan then Bangkok. WOW ...... I guess by this age and after all the traveling i've done the past 22 years, I should be used to it. This time is different though, I've never felt this kind of Happiness while at the same time, anxiety. It's a feeling I've been trying to avoid. Since I've applied to the Peace Corps back in NOVEMBER of 2008. This is the day I have been waiting for, the day where I can say " I'm flying off to be a Peace Corps Volunteer".

I think it's the strange feeling of knowing that so much can change once (after ) I leave.
1) AFTER TEN YEARS, my mom finally has her Citizenship interview on Jan 23rd and I wont be here to hold her hand and enjoy that moment with her.
2) Due to companies merging, on March 12th, she will be laid off from her work.
3) With all that, she might be heading back to Urumqi for an extended period of time OR might find a job in Shanghai, or return back to U.S after a while spending time at Home. After ten years of not seeing her Mom, of course, she would want to return back ASAP

Part of me feels so incompetent, How can I go off to Thailand to develop some village when the person that is closest to me might need my support during all those life changes... ? Mother Theresa had a quote " When you decide to help someone, start with the ones closest to you" ( I might have butchered that a bit) regardless, I have completely failed at helping the person closest to me :( I really hope beyond her grunts for me leaving her, beyond her " maybe you'll come back early, " ugggh this girl just does whatever she wants.." That she is Proud of Me !

All that is part of my thought processes as I come closer to my departure; I'm going to stop writing here for now, so I will be urged to complete my thoughts when I have some time in L.A tomorrow night.

Don't ever regret your decision,
- Zari

2010!!!!! it's the year to be an official PCV

10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1~~ HAPPY NEW YEAR! I LOVE that moment, that moment of happiness is like no other and it's even more amazing when you are surrounded with people that you truly appreciate and love. Its that moment when you realize how lucky you are; regardless of all the good/bad that you went through the year before. and SO THANKFUL to be in that moment as you countdown to a new year!

For me, as ALL that went through my mind, it also hit me that I was about to be involved on a journey of my life- as a Community Based Organizational Development Volunteer with the U.S. Peace Corps ! WOW what a title!

Well primarily, my job is to cooperate with the subdistrict administrative offices in Thailand to establish "capacity-building projects" of course projects that cover the needs of local communities (or villages where I'll be living in after the first 3 months of training in Bangkok). I'm not going to lie, i am completely overwhelmed, scared, nervous, anxious, and excited! and that's whole lot of emotion to feel all at once esp when i got 14 days to put all that in 80 pounds of luggage that i havent started to pack!

As much as I hate saying good-byes, I want to see as many people as possible. Take as many pictures as possible... that is all i will have for the next 27 months ! well of course I would LOVE LOVE LOVE visitors, care-packages, letters...

Speaking of letters and care-packages... here is the address you need to know to make me smile :)

Zailina (Zerina) Borhan PCT

242 Rajvithi Road

Amphur Dusit

Bangkok 10300 , Thailand

* Only letters will be accepted to this address, wait until I actually have a permanent address to send care-packages *

Other ways of communication:

Skype : Uyghurzari

Facebook

Blog :)

G-chat : Zari8771@gmail.com

I think that should do, the first three months I might be ' connected' on/off since I did hear that training is pretty intense..

A glimpse from my Aspiration Statement as to " Why Peace Corps?"

The reason why I have so much respect for the Peace Corps is because it works with populations around the world that constantly feel neglected or forgotten. For example, it is easy for an organization to come in for aid post-natural disasters but as years go by, that population is left for themselves to raise back the standard of living. The involvement of volunteers have allowed for people to build relations and in a very influential way build hope in the lives of strangers. The majority of the people living in less developed countries live everyday for the pure reason of making a living, because they feel forgotten and that is a feeling that no human being should ever feel. I was born as an Uyghur, a minority population (Muslim-turkic to be specific) located in the north-western part of China. A population that is increasingly under the strict oppression of the Chinese government. A population of 9 million people that lives everyday with the rest of the world oblivious to their suffering. I had the privilege of coming to the United States when I was thirteen, and I have only met a handful of Americans who knew the story of the Uyghurs. Hence, existing without actual existence is the reality of my people and the reality of so many more people that are forgotten all around the world. And being part of the Peace Corps would be the beginning of many changes that I want to see myself be involved in.

I hope all this gives 'my audience' an understanding of " the Uyghur girl's " mind as a P.C.V !

till next time,

don't forget to Live, Laugh and Love,

- Zari :)