I had an EPIPHANY!

Today, for our last assignment from our CBOD core staff we were told to do “Life Skills” activity with a chosen group. I think all of us are getting pretty tired of these temporary projects here in our villages, when we all know that all of us are leaving Chainat in less than a month now. Therefore these activities are getting a bit annoying but today as much as we had no preparation, no mind-set to really wanting to do this activity we went over to the School because we all decided to do our activity with the nearby elementary school students. We did an activity relating to cooperation and the students actually understood the purpose of this activity which made all of us feel really accomplished. With our little Thai, and our struggles to explain the “ human knot” game in Thai, the students were able to learn that “ it is important to help each other” :) that made me smile :)
On to the next awesome part of my day (all my Muslim friends will be VERY proud of me for this), we went to the nearby Mosque and had lunch with its members :) After some delicious rice with chicken and perhaps our most favorite- peanut sauce salad- we all sat around the table and talked for the pure reason of just talking. For once, there was no agenda, no questions, to “intentional relationship building”, we just talked about anything and everything with our favorite Thai/Pakistani Muslim Ghengiz Khan. He always is just so content, so welcoming and just so happy to be around us; while we feel ten times more grateful to be around him. He is genuinely interested in our purpose for being here and during a conversation about that he asked “ so what will you guys do after being in Thailand for two years?” Joel and I both explained that most of us will finish school or will start our Masters' studies. He had a surprised look on his face, he repeatedly asked our age and was very surprised that we were already done with undergraduate studies. Then, he looked at us and said “ YOU GUYS ARE LUCKY”

Have you ever had that moment where you have realized how “aloof” you've been until someone else mentions the obvious? And it only takes that one single comment for you to ground yourself back to reality? Well that is how I felt, the exact moment I heard that sentence from Ghenghiz. It's true, it has been an exhausting 2 months, everything from the hot weather, the 20+ mosquito bites, the riding the bike during the peak of the day, the four hour language six times/week, the 3 hour technical five days a week at the most “suck your life out” location, the repeated flip charting and on top of all that the pressure to be “ riap roiy” has probably left most of us questioning our skills/abilities rather than feeling 100% ready to tackle our site. But when you think about it though at the end of the day, we ARE the lucky ones because we control our lives here. Doesn't matter if we are living in the fish-bowl or locking our selves in our room, we control whether we want to be here or not. We control our last strike, whether it be 2 months from now, 1 year from now, or two years from now. I get to say when I have had enough “rice” that it is just time for me to go home; but of course, I would never* say that because I am loving life here. Still, knowing how grateful and lucky I am to be here makes all those negatives seem just a normal part of my day that I just smile and live by :) Every day, every moment there are times where we get frustrated with our situation here; and we miss the people, the food, the convenience of life that we have left behind but, at least for me, everything comes back to the fact that “ this is what I wanted 2 years ago”. If we want, all this can end as soon as tomorrow and that we will be on the next plane ride home but as much as we complain, we are here because we want to be. Having the right to chose, the option to leave when we have had enough makes us “ lucky” therefore, take in the frustration, the happiness, the knowledge and the culture, you will be surprised how much “ luckier” you will feel once it is all over and done (and that day will also come :)
* P.S. of course, never say never either :)